Good Grief
“Good Grief!” are words we often utter when we hear or see something that we can’t believe. We may say them when we are frustrated, irritated, or exasperated by something or someone. However, these two words today refer to grieving that is good. I am not saying that grief is good, but that proper grieving is healthy.
Grief can seem overwhelming, seemingly impossible to overcome, and depressing. Grief can cause us to lose hope if we do not put it in its proper perspective. I Thessalonians 4:13 reminds us that we should not sorrow (grieve) as those who do not have hope. The scripture does not tell us that we should not sorrow.
When Moses died the Children of Israel mourned for thirty days. They did the same for Aaron. The time of mourning for Jacob was seventy days. Even with these periods of time given, grief can last much longer.
In the Old Testament, grief was sometimes shown by a person putting on sackcloth and pouring ashes on oneself to give an outward appearance of the grief that was going on inside. Jacob poured ashes over his head and put sackcloth around his waist when he was told that a wild beast killed Joseph. The fact that Joseph was alive, did not remove the grief and anguish Jacob experienced.
Oftentimes, we are told to “be strong” or “don’t cry” because some see crying as being weak, when it is only an expression of the sorrow one feels. We put on a happy face and say we are fine, but inwardly we sometimes struggle with the pain we are feeling. Grieving is necessary because it helps us process the feeling of loss when someone we love dies. To make it easier we sometimes say they “passed” or “passed away,” when ultimately we know they died.
Dealing with grief head-on is necessary. If we don’t it, it can cause one to withdraw, in some cases go into a state of depression, become dependent on drugs or alcohol or engage in other unhealthy behavior. If our grief is unresolved, we are not likely to heal and be able to experience the peace that God gives us even while we deal with sorrow.
In our grieving as Christians, we must maintain a proper perspective on death and remember the promise that we have for those who died in Christ and those who may die in Christ later. Although, we may still experience the emotional pains and sorrow of missing someone that we love. We do not sorrow as if we do not have hope.
God said this in Isaiah 61:3 (KJV). “To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified.” This scripture gives us God’s desired outcome for us after we have grieved.
Over the next few weeks, various writers will share ways to deal with grief and provide resources that can help us along the way. In the meantime, face the emotions and pains that come with grief and trust God to give you the strength to deal with it, so that you can overcome its effects.